They both love touching each other's face.
Here was a new game that occupied a good 15 minutes. Each of them pushed the plastic barrel back and forth. This game was key with 2 cause with one on each side mommy did not have to play.
Here is another new favorite toy! They love playing peek-a-boo with the animals. This bring back great memories of watching my niece Katie play with a similar toy years ago. How time flys! On a side note, I had to go down to a doctor's office which was down the street from Albany Med yesterday and wow did that bring back a mix of emotions. As I was driving down New Scotland Rd. all I could think about was driving to see Ava when she was in the NICU. It was a rush of emotions all at once that I started to tear up. Part of me was overwhelmed with happiness at how healthy and beautiful she is. Part of me still holds guilt inside cause it was my issue not them on why they had to come out early...they might of stayed in much longer if it wasn't for me. I mean not that it matters now cause they are big and healthy now but she might have escaped the NICU if my body cooperated. I remember arguing with the doctors as they were trying to get me to induce even earlier. I knew two things, I wanted to wait as long as possible and I wanted to do it natural. I got to 35 1/2 wks and I did it natural. At least I won 1 battle.
I am not sure now thinking back how we got through those days....we just did. Maybe it was the adrenaline. Going back and forth 2-3x a day was exhausting but on the other hand I wanted to go even more to just be there with her. She was mostly sleeping each time I was there and sometimes I couldn't even hold her cause they wanted her to sleep but it was the feeling that I just had to see her. We often brought Isabelle too cause we felt it was important for her to see her sister. We needed to be there as a family. It was also great to know that when we weren't there usually one set of grandparents were. She always had visitors. There was a 2 person rule in the NICU so we had to schedule shifts so we did not overlap. That is the meaning of family. Our parents were livesavers during that time by either going to see Ava or watching Isabelle so we could spend some one on one time with Ava.
Part of me is still upset about how long she was there. I truly do not think she needed to be there 3 weeks. I feel like that time was stolen from me. If we could have just seen the gastro specialist earlier and then they would have figured out earlier she needed a special formula we could have been home right away. After they switched her to Neocate she was home within 1 day. Ahh, residents. It was not until the 2nd time we were in Albany Med for a week did they figure that out and that was only after a very tired mommy who was staying there 24/7 in the picu decided to tell off the resident and threathen to check themselves out at 3am if we did not see the head doctor the next morning. Then you see results. I had enough of taking care of two kids in the picu all day and sleeping on a chair.
Another thing Dave and I talk about a lot now is that we both have a hard time thinking about how small they actually were at first. I mean I know they were small but now when I see newborns I can't think about how they were smaller. The newborns look so small so I can't imagine our girls were 1/2 the weight of that. I guess I just did not see it like others did. Maybe parents can just see past that. I remember hating to hear comments about how small they were or when people were afraid to hold them. I guess Dave and I just did not see it, it was natural to us that they were small and we just adjusted immediately. I look at their size now and can't even picture where they were....they grow so fast and make up for lost time is an understatement for preemies! I regret not taking pictures to really document their size. We have tons of picture but they just don't show to me how small they were. Maybe I was afraid to really capture that at the time but I look at preemie clothes now and smile to think they fit in them as it doesn't seem possible.
I am not really sure why I am even thinking to write about this now. Maybe it is because I am watching Private Practice right now and it has a little preemie on it and it made me think about where we started and where we are today and marvel in how far we have come as a family in such a short amount of time. One memory that always makes me smile is when I saw Dave walking around the OR carrying our little babies. He was instantly a wonderful daddy. A natural. It sounds corny but this is what life is about, It must have been our grandparents watching over us in heaven cause we were and still are truly blessed!
On a final note, here is Ava in the strangest position as she fell asleep during dinner yesterday! I was feeding Isabelle and turned to Ava for the next scoop and there she was...guess she was done!
